Believe it or not, it all starts with your mindset.
Here is the thing, every desire, dream or goal, can be achieved if you have the right mindset. It starts with your thoughts, then action!
Disclaimer- I know many will disagree with this statement, and argue that our circumstances and background is what controls our reality, not our thoughts. You might say “it is not realistic to dream or desire above what we have now”. Some people label those who achieved success as lucky without acknowledging the effort and thought process they went through to be successful.
As human beings, we have limiting believes that confines our ability to live our full potential, whether these believes are a result of experiences embedded in the past or existing experiences. We all have some sort of limiting believes, but what’s important is to be aware of them and find ways to overcome them. Whenever I have goals I don’t achieve, I am fully aware of my own limiting believes that stopped me from receiving what I desire. Take this website for example, for the longest time, I wanted to be able to speak and help others. Friends and colleagues have told me on many occasions that I’d be good at it, but I allowed my limiting believes to stop me.
The point is, whenever we don’t receive what we desire, it’s got to do with our own limiting believes. Once we accept the fact that our own limiting beliefs is what is stopping us, we stop blaming others or the universe. My aim today is to share some ways to help you overcome your limiting beliefs and develop a positive mindset. Here we go…
1. Stay in your vortex!
A lot of the times, when you are focusing on your goals/desires, you get influenced by outside events, like your financial situation, people’s opinion, or your own doubts. It’s important to always stay in your vortex. Stay in your happy and focused zone no matter what’s happening outside in the “real” world. Don’t let events that are contradicting with your desires divert your focus.
When I get setbacks in my life or start hearing that noise in my head that makes me anxious and doubtful, there are three things that I do to stay in my vortex:
Just like Grey and Cristina in Grey’s Anatomy, I have “my person”. In my case, 4 persons! They are my true friends who always keep it real with me and support me. Find “your person”
I write in my journal. Writing is such a powerful thing because it trains your brain to focus and affirm what you put on paper. Make sure to affirm what you want and not what you don’t want. As I look back at what I wrote in the past, it’s amazing to see how I was able to achieve many of my goals, even though at the time, I must admit, I was not sure any was possible.
I listen to people I consider my mentors. I have a couple of people I listen to ALL the time. My mentors keep me in my vortex. Here are some of my favorite people to listen to.
2. Listen to your inner voice. It’s always right
Many of us have this nudge to make a change, whether it’s starting a business, ending a relationship, going on an adventure or quitting a job we can’t stand. Yet we don’t take action because we are too afraid or doubtful. Listen to your inner voice, its telling you what you need to do.
Quitting my job was one of the scariest things I’ve done. I had a comfortable job, but I was not happy. I knew I had to make a change but I was scared. Some force just pushed me to do it, and I think it was my inner voice, that somehow got muscles and took over my entire body. Once I did, it was one of the most liberating thing I had ever experienced. Of course I still had anxiety attacks even after I did quit. That’s an entire blog by itself.
It’s all about the journey and the journey will reveal to you what you are supposed to learn from the experience. Trust me, I know it’s scary and I know it can be hard, but staying in a situation where you are not happy or are not doing what you love really sucks and stops you from many possibilities.
3. Always ask yourself what’s the alternative and does it work for you
I use this one all the time! When you're eager to do something, weigh your alternatives and see which one feels right to you. The key word is feel.
Few years ago, my business was going through rough times; low sales, issues with staff, over dues, etc. I had two choices: close a business that I truly believe in, or face the problems with a positive mindset and get my business back on its feet. I won’t lie, there were days I was not sleeping and anxious like hell. I just wanted it all to disappear and be in peace. But the alternative didn’t suite me or my partners! Closing a business that we love and strongly believe in was not an alternative we were willing to accept. It didn’t feel right. As soon as I weighed the options and shifted my mindset, things started improving, and I started seeing solutions and ways to make it even better than it ever was.
You might think this one is such a cliché, but hear me out. By nature, I’m a very ambitious and driven person. I dream big and take big risks. With that, comes a lot of impatience and struggle because I want things to happen quickly, and my way. For those who can relate, as you pursue your goals, it’s important to learn how to surrender and have faith that it will all work out. You have to believe that every contrast (undesired feeling) is there to pave the way. Don’t resist it, the more you resist the time its taking, and the direction its going, things will get worse. I for example got stubborn about it, and it cost me peace of mind, time and money. I am still learning to surrender and every time I am anxious, I make a conscious effort to surrender.
5. Break it down into small pieces
The saying “go big or go home” is not always a wise idea. It used to be my mantra but I realised it didn’t work to my advantage. Now, I break it down to small pieces, small chunks of achievable goals. What this does is, as you achieve small goals and grow, you remain positive in your vortex, and able to move forward with bigger goals. Focusing on the ultimate big goal without attempting to start small creates resistance when the big goal does not materialise. It takes you out of the vortex to a place of disappointment and frustration.
If you achieve the ultimate goal from first attempt, well and good, but if you don’t, you should still feel happy by achieving the small you put out there.
Let us know what you do to train your mind to stay positive? Put a comment below